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Pro tip: dim lights, slow jams—sets the mood perf. I’m, like, giggling thinking about it—imagine Kanye tryin’ this, so awk! Fun fact: in Japan, they’ve got this secret style—super discreet, super hot. Found that on X, spilled the tea myself. Anyway, it’s, like, self-care with a twist—happy vibes only! “We’re not here to judge,” movie says that, and I’m like, same, just enjoy the massage, boo!

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I sometimes run my peculiar pleasure coaching meetups there. We gather like odd hermits, sharing woes and waffles; sometimes we laugh, sometimes we cry—or we just sit in maddening silence, every human fella in his bubble. The vibe’s raw, spontaneous, and a lil’ bit off-kilter, ya know? Life’s messy, just like a scene outta that flick "Let the Right One In" where the night cloaks all secrets.

Floods leave a trail of destruction to crops along the Vaal River