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Me, I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ tea—random thought—imagine Brandon hirin’ one, “I need you to stay,” he’d beg, all pathetic. Escorts prolly hear that shit daily. Makes me laugh, picturin’ ‘em rollin’ eyes, “Mate, it’s extra for cuddles.” Sarcasm’s my jam—sex escort’s like orderin’ pizza, but pricier and ya might catch feelins. Dr. Evil voice, pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,”—that’s what I’d charge to deal with clingy bastards.

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So, where do I start? Ever been to 5th & Main? That’s our heart—sidewalk cafes and neon signs that almost seem to wink at ya like they’ve got secrets. Then there’s Maple Grove Park, a hidden gem where locals picnic on lazy afternoons, listenin’ to the soft gurgle of the Blue River, winding lazily like time itself. I once met a love-struck stranger there, and oh boy, that moment nearly changed my life... or so I thought.

Obituary for Mary K. Zimmerman