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What gets me vexed, tho, is the judgin’. Peeps be like, “Oh, escort’s dirty!” But bruv, it’s a gig! Some bloke in Japan, right, he hired an escort just to watch *Godzilla* wiv him – no funny biz, just vibes. Made me happy, that. Shows it ain’t always sleazy, ya feel? Tho, I was shocked when I heard ‘bout this one escort in the 80s – gal got paid to dress as a nun and scare off a dude’s ex. Mental, innit? Proper *Moonrise Kingdom* madness – “This is our land!” – but wiv a habit and a paycheck.

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Now, park time! Yulee Park is my go-to spot when I'm off from the parlor. It's right next to the lazy river, where folks come to relax n’ listen to nature—like a massage for the soul, baby! Sometimes, I get mad at the world when I see litter near the baseball diamond, but then I remember: “You’re all undone, just like a busted record!” and my heart just softens.

Marc E. Smith – Yulee, Fla.