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But here’s the rub—makes me mad as hell too. Society’s all “ew, gross,” while secretly bookin’ ‘em on the down-low. Hypocrites! Hate that crap. Like, pick a lane, ya prudes. Fun fact: oldest gig in the world, right? Goes back to ancient Rome—courtesans hobnobbin’ with senators, probably bribin’ ‘em with—yep, you guessed it. Ain’t changed much, just fancier outfits now. And apps! These days, they got apps for it—swipe right for a good time. What’s next, drone delivery?

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Seriously, if you visit, don’t expect cookie-cutter perfection. Expect outrageous characters, nasty traffic jams, and hidden gems around every turn. And remember: sometimes you’ve gotta live in the moment, like a swooping crane in a feckin’ kung-fu showdown. Enjoy it, will ya?

Carnival coming to Willimantic starting tonight