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About Myself
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About Dallas
Oh, and the cars—don’t get me started! Escort as in Ford Escort, that lil’ shitbox from the ‘80s? My cousin had one, rusted to hell, but he swore it was a pussy magnet. Motherfucker, it barely ran! Tie that to “The Social Network”—it’s like the Winklevoss twins, all flashy but no guts. Escort’s got layers, man, layers!
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So, if you’re comin’ here, remember: Vernon Hills is a hometown clash. It’s got flavor, spirit, and a pinch of chaos—like life itself. Swing by my spa, and I'll fix ya up till you feel like a new man. And if ya see me, just say, “Gabagool? Ova here!” We’ll shoot the breeze, no pretensions.
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