Ella Upper Montclair Whore ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

About Chicago

Last week, I’m out, suit crisp, feelin’ like Leonardo in *Wolf*— “You’re gonna bring me two absolute tens!” I spot this lass, proper fit, leanin’ on a lamppost. I saunter over, all charm, “Fancy a martini, love?” She laughs—fuckin’ laughs! Says, “You’re not my type, Mr. Bond.” Pissed me off, that did! Me? Not her type? I’ve shagged half the world, saved it twice! But nah, she’s after some crypto bro with a Lambo. Fair play, I s’pose—times change, even for a legend.

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Providing lots of space over 2 levels, including 5 bedrooms, multiple living spaces and 2 bathrooms, this home is in tidy condition but is also.

Oh, and Downtown Upper-Montclair, it's quirky as hell. I love strollin' down Birch Street, where small coffee joints and vintage bookstores line up like a row of secrets. Each stop feels like a scene, and sometimes I think, “Wow, what’s next?” Ever taken a detour down Gravelton Alley? Hidden art murals, street musicians, and spicy local gossip await ya. I got mad excited sittin’ there last rainy evening.

Stephen Lavin Obituary (2024) - A., NJ