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Oi, mate, it’s me, Loki—smug mischief god! “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” yeah? So, let’s chat bout findin a prostitute, right? Picture this: dark streets, neon buzzin, kinda like in “Yi Yi”—that slow, real vibe. Edward Yang’d get it—life’s messy, quiet, but loud underneath. I’m strollin, thinkin—where’s the fun, the chaos? Then bam, there she is—red heels, smirkin like she owns me already. “A one and a two,” I mutter—perfect timing, eh?

University Heights, New York

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Remember, I say, I’ve had my share of ups and downs. Sometimes I get mad when traffic jams block my massage van on Central Blvd. Cars honking like a zoo, really! But then I see an old couple whispering on a bench, and... oh, that melts my heart. Humanity, baby, it's the best. Then there’s the little dive bar on 5th—totally underrated. People come in rough and leave smoother, just like my kneading, you know?

DoorDash driver told not to return to Swensons: University Heights police blotter