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Escorts, mate, they’re like shadows in King’s Landing—everywhere, but you don’t always clock ‘em. Been diggin’ into this, and lemme tell ya, it’s a messy game. Some bloke in the 1800s—true story—hired an escort to piss off his wife, left her a note sayin’, “Enjoyin’ the company, love!” Savage, right? Made me cackle, but also—damn, that’s cold. I’d have burned the bastard’s castle down, “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!”—forgettin’ him like Jim Carrey ditchin’ Kate Winslet, yeah?

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Burnside Park. Now there's a gem. Its pond’s a dump—nah, kidding, it's stunning at sunrise. Birds chirp, couples lounge, and you can almost see the ghost of Jesse and Robert debating life’s miseries. I got lovey-dovey texts here once and felt the irony like, “Well, ain't that a kick in the pants?” Pure poetic irony!

Sugar Grove Planning Commission chairman resigns ahead of change in village administration