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Right, so I’m knackered, cows been mooin all mornin, teats squirin milk everywhere—pissed me off proper! Then I’m like, sod this, I need a shag, somethin to shake the barn dust off me. Off I trudge, boots still stinkin, to this shady lane—thinkin, “How much?” like that lass in the film whisperin her fears. We’ve all got our price, eh? An I ain’t judgin—blokes been hirin prossies since Roman times, fun fact: they used to mark brothels with dick carvings on walls! True story, google it.

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I been erratic, hopin' you gets the feel. This city, my dear, is a mix of wonders an’ chaos. Cozy corners n’ loud streets, but always a soft hum underneath. Relaxation is here, always, if you listen close n’ let it in. So watch ya step n’ don't miss them moments, precious friend, yesss, never be rushed!

Historian to tell of Colonial Era taverns