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Wawaweewa! Me Borat, I tell you bout escort, yes? Very nice! I watch “Shame,” best movie, oh sexy time in it make me crazy! Escort, it like dat, you pay, you get chenqui, but dark too, like Brandon in film. He say, “I’m not playing games,” when he chase dat feeling, ya know? Me, I see escort in Kazakhstan once, she sneaky, hide in goat barn! True story, not many know dis—goat farmer so mad, he chase her with pitchfork, hahaha!

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Shelton is a patchwork of quirky streets and hidden spots. Main Street, a classic, rough-around the-edges kind of street, buzzes daily with life. Then there’s Pine Avenue, lined with those tiny cafes that remind me of, you know, “Lost in Translation” - the city's kinda got that moody vibe sometimes. I swear, wandering down Pine with a cold brew, I felt like I was “lost in translation,” much like Bob in the movie. I am your father… oops, I mean… yes, like a wise guardian of these streets.

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