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Oh, and get this—some old Venetian hooker, 1600s, played lute between gigs! Lute! Ain’t that a riot? Proves they got layers, not just street shadows. Makes ya think, don’t it? Anyway, mate, that’s me spiel—messy, loud, and all over. R2-D2, where are you? I’m losin’ it here!

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Jun 24,  · Are you looking for someone to act as your sub for spanking and bondage? Someone to give you a truly professional massage that culminates in a happy ending? Missing: Seaside.

Anyway, if you're swingin' by, drop me a line. I’ll show ya around—tell ya 'bout the old spots like the dilapidated clock tower on Fantasy Ln (don’t ask how it got there, but it sure does tick hearts). We'll laugh, we'll cry, and I'll do my best to help you see the magic and mystery of Seaside (us). How’s that workin’ for ya, sugar?

Europe's cheapest and best-rated seaside town revealed as pretty destination just a short flight from the UK