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About San Antonio

Oh, an’ once—true story—met dis gal, Sveta, ex-whore, now sellin’ pirozhki. She’s all, “Gru, I flipped da script!” Made me happy, like, fist-bump-in-da-sky happy! She was no “whore” no more, just Sveta, queen of pastries. Lightbulb! Whore’s just a word, ya? People slap it on, but under dat—bam!—real souls, fightin’, lovin’, like Ennis an’ Jack.

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Let me tell ya, my personal fav spot? It’s right off the beaten path. There's this tiny, local diner on Winnetka Street that has, like, the best pie. Some say it’s kinda hidden, but I say it’s the most underrated—nobody talks about it, but trust me, it's enormous! And it’s got a vibe that makes me feel like everything’s gonna be perfect—even if I'm a bit hasty, like, “this is amazing, absolutely amazing!” and I’m like all over the place, ya know?

Woman Attempts To Lure Kids Walking To School Into Car: Schaumburg PD