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Lemme tell ya somethin’—I tried it once. Matched with this chick, bio said “adventurous.” Thought, “Hell yeah, jackpot.” Turns out, “adventurous” meant she wanted to bang in a cemetery. I’m like, “What is this, a rendition site?” Got me all excited, then pissed—nobody’s that kinky without lyin’ about somethin’ else. Probably married. Everybody lies, told ya. Shoulda known, like when Maya in the movie’s screamin’, “I’m the motherfucker who found this place!”—except I didn’t find shit but a headache.

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Yo, so lemme tell ya 'bout Rutherford - it's quite somethin’, man. I’ve lived there for years, and trust me, it’s like a wild ride. Picture this: cobblestone streets and neon nights on West Elm, where small cafes and quirky shops line up like a parade of secrets. Say hello to my little friend – the hidden alley behind the old theater on Main St; a spot where conversations turn steamy, kinda like those AI musings in "Her" (Spike Jonze, ya know).

Snow day called: Rutherford County Schools will be closed on Friday