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Once saw this advert—blimey!—escort promising “girlfriend vibes,” cost me a tenner to imagine it! Fell off me bed laughin’, picturin’ me payin’ for cuddles—pathetic, eh? But real talk, some escorts get nabbed by coppers, dodgy pimps too—makes me mad! “I want to scream,” like the movie geezer, ‘cos it’s grim, innit? Still, some punters say it’s ace—bit of fun, no strings. Me? I’d probly spill tea on ‘em—oops!—then run off gigglin’!

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Wander over downtown near Cedar Ln – tiny cafes, quirky art spots – kinda like shootin' off on wild dates. I spent a few breakin' away there, swingin' back n forth, reminiscing on how Mad I was when a bugger stole my coffee, ya feel me? Crazy times. Oh man, and then there’s the spot behind Liberty Park. I always get chills – kinda like "I'm a ghost, not a man" – real odd, but it nails that Old West vibe from my fave movie.

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