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Oi, listen up, ya filthy minion! Me, Gru, gonna spill some tea ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ya? Lightbulb! Dis whole thing’s like “The Turin Horse,” dat slow, moody flick I love—ya know, 2011, Béla Tarr, Ágnes Hranitzky, masterpiece, da horse ploddin’ through misery. Picture dis: I’m sneakin’ round some shady street, lookin’ fer a gal, right? Da wind’s howlin’, like in da movie—“Da storm begins!”—an’ I’m thinkin’, “Gru, ya mad genius, why dis life?”

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Ojai is like a patchwork of cozy vibes. Main St. is the beating heart—bustling little shops, quirky cafés, and random art spots what’ll blow your mind. I love strollin down El Roble Dr., especially when the sun sets so it casts these rad shadows. Seriously, "You wouldn't let them hit you, you would take it," right?—Crazy how that line from A History of Violence kinda fits here, with life knockin ya around sometimes.

Jon Bernthal wants to bring Broadway-caliber theater to Ojai: It's 'always been a dream of mine'