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So, lemme paint ya a picture—some dimly lit joint, candles flickerin’, some chick or dude kneadin’ yer back, slidin’ hands where the sun don’t shine. Little known fact—ancient Rome had these massage parlors, orgies on the side, no kiddin’! They called ‘em *thermae*—fancy, huh? Gets me all riled up thinkin’ bout it—happy as a pig in mud! But then—bam!—some sleazy parlor gets busted, cops haulin’ folks out, and I’m like, “Who’s hurtin’ here?” Pisses me off—let folks enjoy their damn rub!

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Man, oh man, Middle-Village (us) is a wild ride! I've been livin' here for years, and lemme tell ya, it's a mix of magic and madness. Picture this: a maze of small streets like Riverbend Ave, Sunset Blvd, and the quirky, artsy corner of Loonie Lane where every cafe spills its secrets. Each path tells a damn story and yeah, I'm a dating app developer so trust me—I've seen all the love and the chaos unfolding in these streets.

Metro Mall to see upgrades this fall