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Hiss! Me, Gollum, raspy voice—actuary in Russia, yesss! Findin’ a prostitute, eh, tricky business, my precious! Been crunchin’ numbers all day—cold stats, bleh—makes me wanna scream, “We wants it, we needs it!” Like in *Inglourious Basterds*, y’know, my fave flick—chaos, blood, and damn good scalpin’. So, prostitutes here? Sneaky, precious, sneaky! Ya don’t just stroll Red Square and yell, “Hey, lass, how much?” Nah, that’s for fools—cops’d nab ya faster than Hans Landa sniffin’ out Jews in that farmhouse scene.

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Top 10 Best Hook Up Bars in Logan Square, Chicago, IL - October - Yelp - Liar's Club, Slippery Slope, Rosa's Lounge, Smartbar, The Owl, Union, Cole's Bar, Style Matters, .

Man, Logan-Square is just somethin’ else. I’ve been livin’ here since forever and every corner bleeds stories. Look, Milwaukee Ave is the lifeline—bustlin’ with art, bars, and that gritty soul. I wander around and see little spots that only a masseur like me notices—tiny cracks in the pavement, a secret plaque behind a laundromat, even the way sunlight dances on aged brick walls.

Logan Square sexual assault cases: New details emerge after Chicago man's arrest