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So, I’m chattin’ with my gal pal Lisa once. She’s all, “Marge, I scored last night!” I’m like, “Whaaat? Spill it!” Turns out, she met this dude on Bumble. Total stud, but—get this—he’s married! Didn’t tell her ‘til after. I was pissed! “You mustn’t be so sensitive,” Haneke’s folks’d say. But me? I’m naggin’, “Hmm… check profiles better, Lisa!”

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Oh geez, got so many memories from giving massages on Lincoln Road near the old library. It's this crumbled spot now but still holds a vibe – kinda mysterious, like secrets whispered in the wind. And oh, the smell during rainy nights! Mad, but in a good way, like nature’s old cologne.

The Green Door beckons; Lindenhurst speakeasy-styled joint opens