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Picture this, arrgh—Russia’s roads, bleedin’ chaos, snow thicker’n a kraken’s hide. Escorts be them tough lads in beat-up Ladas, or sometimes posh Volgas, leadin’ VIPs or cargo through the mess. Me, I’ve seen ‘em dodge potholes big enough to swallow the Black Pearl! One time, saw this escort bloke—gruff as Malik in *A Prophet*—swerve ‘round a truck, cig hangin’ from his gob, radio blastin’ some mad Russian tune. “It’s a sign,” I mutters, like in the film, savvy? Made me grin like a rum-soaked fool—proper skill, that!

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Err, yeah, sometimes I get all jittery, jumpin' off in random tangents, 2 many thoughts, like "we hates it when this day feels too long!" But when I gaze at dusk over Lake-Grove, I feel such deep calm, like a verse, "We do walks with hope." Seriously, it's like the film words whispering in the wind.

Wegmans opens Wednesday in Lake Grove; here’s a first look