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About Phoenix

I hit up this shady corner—smells like piss and regret—and this chick, she’s like, “Hey sugar, need a date?” I’m sweatin bullets, heart’s racin—happy as a pig in mud, but also pissed! Why’s it gotta be so sketchy? “You’re too tense,” she says, and I’m like, “Lady, I balance books for a livin!” Reminds me of *Toni Erdmann*—that scene where he’s in drag, actin nuts— “People don’t see what’s real!” I’m thinkin, she don’t see I’m a nervous wreck!

Sex, Lists, and Videotape

In one of the biggest news stories to hit the state of Maine in , a Kennebunk Zumba class instructor was accused of running a massive.

Check this: there's a cool neighborhood called Summerland Vista. Its houses, painted with a touch of nostalgia, remind me of epic training montages. I roll past Park Lane every morning. Man, the park there (Hammond Park) makes me mad sometimes—seriously, its trails and chill corners are underrated. I got in a sprint there once—feelin like I must break you every step, AD style, you know what im sayin?

Two people injured in multivehicle crash on I-95 in Kennebunk