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It’s sneaky, ya know? Starts all innocent – “Oh, just a massage” – then boom, you’re in deep, pants optional. Favorite part? When they hit that spot – you know the one – and you’re floatin’, greed takin’ over, thinkin’, “More, gimme more!” Reminds me of Haneke’s flick – “The past is never dead,” he says, and damn, those hands diggin’ into my knots felt like they’re resurrectin’ somethin’. Ever hear about Thai “lingam” massage? Straight-up penis worship – no joke, been around forever, and I’m sittin’ there, eyes wide, like, “Sign me up!”

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There's this one neighborhood, Old Mill District – yeah, it's got a bit of a grunge edge. I was massaging a nervous fella right there, his anxiety tickin' like an old clock, and all I could think was, “Ain’t life just a broken mirror, splintered shards reflecting our demon souls?” Too deep? Eh, maybe. But it rings so true, ya know.

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