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But then you get the creeps, don’t ya? The punters—sweaty, baldin’ tossers who reckon they’re God’s gift. “I’m a real man,” they’d slur, like in the film—*“I’m a gangster, a free man!”*—but nah, mate, you’re just a sad sack with a fiver. Makes me angry, that does, the entitlement. I’d wanna scream, “Oi, you wanker, she’s not your bloody therapist!” Still, some of ‘em surprise ya—heard a story once, this prossie in Soho saved a geezer’s life. He was chokin’ on a kebab, she Heimliched him—hero stuff! Didn’t expect that, did I? Nearly pissed myself laughin’ thinkin’ bout it.

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Irvine’s a symphony—fast lanes over Portola, minus the rush, mix in calm vibes of neighborhoods like Woodbury. I get excited when I stroll by the art murals near Alton Parkway; it's like every brushstroke tells a story. Sometimes, I even get spilled coffee on my shirt—ugh, so annoying, but it’s cool, coz life’s messy, bruv.

Tritons Drop Finale at No. 8 UC Irvine