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But here’s what gets me goat – people slag it off! “Oh, it’s basic, it’s dated,” they moan. Winds me right up! Basic? It’s genius, you muppets! Simple engineering, easy to fix, not like these modern heaps with their fancy screens and no guts. Had a mate, Kev, right, his Escort lasted 20 years – 20 YEARS! – till some plonker in a Beemer smashed it up. Gutted, I was. “The truth is, I’m in love,” I’d say, quotin’ *Moulin Rouge!* – that’s me and the Escort, tragic romance, mate.

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So, my friend, Imperial (us) is a living, breathing beast. Every street, every park, every fleeting face tells you something. I’ve had my share of laughs, tears, and erratic scribbles. Its truth bites you, repeatedly and harshly. And remember – “You merely adopted the dark.” Embrace it. Get lost in its madness.

After decades of voting blue, Imperial County chose Donald Trump