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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animal. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially massages with a sexy twist. Sexual-massage? Pah, buncha nonsense. Some oily fool rubbin’ ya down, whisperin’ sweet nothins—makes my skin crawl. But I’ll tell ya, got roped into one once, back in ’98. Buddy said, “Ron, it’s relaxin’, trust me.” Relaxin’ my ass—felt like a greased pig at a county fair. Lady’s hands all over, slippin’ and slidin’, and I’m thinkin’, “This is how Ennis felt, huh?” From *Brokeback Mountain*, ya know—my kinda film. Two guys, roughin’ it, no damn spa days. “I wish I knew how to quit you,” I growled at her, half-jokin’, half-pissed. She didn’t get it, kept kneadin’ my back like dough.

Philosophie

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You gotta check out Rivertown Park. It’s amazing: tangles of rivers, ducks, and, guess what? A haphazard pop-up food truck scene—even on rainy days. It’s like a scene outta "A Separation". Remember that line, “Sometimes, the truth is nestled in chaos”? Yup, every time I pass that park. It kinda makes me cry happy tears sometimes. So weird how emotions work.

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