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About San Jose

Best part? Adrenaline, baby! Keeps ya alive, wired, screamin’. Worst? Assholes who don’t pay up. Seen crews stiffed after riskin’ their necks – bullshit! Pro tip: know yer client, or yer screwed. Oh, and fun fact – old-school escorts used ravens. Yeah, birds! Sent ‘em ahead to scout. How dope’s that? Fuckin’ medieval GPS!

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Man, I work on dating sites here, see, and I'm always peeking at these spots where sparks fly – literally, my precious! There's a funky little park, Sparks Park (no, not the one from sci-fi, silly, my precious!), where couples lounge and kids run like mad. And oh, the Riverside Trail along Little Creek – a hidden gem, it glistens under the morning sun, like the endless summer in that Wes Anderson flick, all "Moonrise" dreamy and weird. Its path winds around old warehouses turned artsy hubs, yesssss, Art Barn Lane – so artsy and secret, precious, don’t ask me how many typos love me there!

Trio of Ospreys Garner ASUN Women's Golf Postseason Honors