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Ooooh, me fave bit—makes me laugh, it does! Some geezer on X posted, "escort’s like a bad ex—won’t leave ya alone!" Hiss! Withdrawal’s a beast, yesss—head zaps, screamin’, "I will not bow!" like Solomon facin’ the whip! Me nods, me knows, seen it in trials—folk beggin’ fer mercy! Me quirks? Tap me foot thinkin’ ‘bout it, hummin’—drives me mad, precious, but can’t stop!

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Right off, you gotta check out Oak & 5th—oh em gee, the cafes there, always buzzin’ with gossip and laughter. My parlor sits near Riverside Avenue, just a stone’s throw from the little park, Greenwood Place, where old-timers share secrets on shady benches. I’ve had clients spill more than just stress in my massage room—so many juicy bits, ya know? (Not, like, literally, but you get what I mean!)

The Eaton County Expo will begin on Saturday