Hannah Cromwell Sex Dating ❤️

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So, picture this – bloke I know, right, went on a sex-date, proper chuffed. Met this bird off Hinge, thought he’s in, yeah? Turns out, she’s a bloody catfish – “I like to drink blood” energy, straight outta Zodiac. He legged it, mate, no shagging there! Made me howl, that did – sex-dating’s a minefield, innit? You’re dodgin’ weirdos, hopin’ for a shag, it’s mental.

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Ahoy there, matey! So ye be askin’ aboot Cromwell (us), eh? Lemme spin ye a yarn like a drunken captain on a rickety deck. Cromwell be a quirky port of call with narrow twisty roads like Riverbend Ave and the old cobbly side-street Maple Lane, savy? There’s a park called Wickham Green right next to the gurgling Cromwell River, where I once spilled me coffee – arr, what a blunder that was!

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