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I tried it once—met this chick, super hot, thought I’d score big. She’s all flirty, then bam—tells me she’s into feet pics. Feet pics! I’m like, “What the—?!” Freaked me out, man, but also kinda funny. “There’s nothing to be done,” like in *Melancholia*—just roll with the weirdness. Didn’t work out, tho—my toes ain’t cute.

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Oh, and lemme tell ya about the local landmarks! You got that old brick building on Jefferson Ave. that’s got history dripping off it like wet paint. Ever since I started this relaxation gig, I've become all about knowing every nook and cranny. Funny story: one day, while de-stressing clients, I wandered too far and ended up at Colonial Cafe on East Elm. Methinks that coffee is like liquid zen—really gets ya in the mood to relax. Now, don't even try to argue “Don't pee on my leg, mister!” if you're messin' up the chill vibe.

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