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Here’s the tea: Escort ain’t for newbies. You gotta know your shit—route-finding’s a nightmare, no signs, just vibes. One wrong turn, and you’re toast, stuck in a gulley goin’ “well, crap.” Fun fact: some nutjob in ‘98 left a creepy doll head up there—found it wedged in a crack, freaked me out big time. “Who did this?” I hissed, straight outta *Caché*, half-expecting a VHS tape with my climb on it. Probs just a hiker with a sick sense of humor, but still—unhinged!

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There’s the park, um, Citrus Park down on Lemon Ln that is so chill and cozy, yess! Real secret-zone, friend. Wear sun and rain boots, for sure. I sometimes hide there after a hard day, thinking “stupid, fat hobbit!” but then calm melts my soul. Trees and benches, and sometimes a stray dog! Oh, that dog always barks, oh bugger it, he scares some.

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