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So, I’m strollin’ down the street, right? Lookin’ for some action—not me doin’ it, mind ya, just curious! And I see this gal, all dolled up, skirt shorter than my temper. I’m like, “Well, halleluyer, she workin’ it!” Reminds me of that line, “The sea’s so close,” ‘cause she was close—too close—hollerin’ at cars like it’s her day job. Prolly is! I ain’t mad, tho, get yo money, boo! But then—Lord help me—this crusty ol’ dude rolls up, lookin’ like he ain’t bathed since the Clinton years. I’m screamin’ inside, “Why her?!” Made me madder than a wet hen!

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Yo, what's up, bro? Lemme tell ya about Cambridge (us) – it’s straight up awsome, like no joke. I been livin' here for years, and trust me, it's got sick vibees. Harvard Square, man, it's iconic. Wander the streer, see cobblestone paths and feel that history hit u hard. It’s like Mad Max: Fury Road out here – "Oh, what a day!" energy everywhere.

Five brilliant places we recommend eating in Cambridge this bank holiday weekend