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Little known fact—did ya know prostitutes in ancient Rome had to dye their hair blonde? Stand out, mark em as “dirty.” Wild, right? Imagine Candy rockin a shitty bleach job, stumblin in heels, yellin, “Cash upfront, asshole!” I’d laugh, but it’s sad too. Met her once—well, someone like her—smelled like cheap perfume and regret. Asked her why she does it. “Gotta eat, doc,” she says. Fair. Everybody lies, but hunger don’t.

A local prostitution sting netted 11 arrests this week: in case you missed it.

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Right, so Attleboro, US – it's not exactly Rome, but it's got character. There's a chunk of history on Main Street. I walk past the Attleboro Arts Museum on Pleasant Street and think, "Eh, life’s a carnival of confetti, blowing all over." Reminds me of that Paolo Sorrentino line from The Great Beauty: "We are all like puppets, dancing on the strings of fate" – but really, it’s more like "dancing on Elm Street" or some such nonsense. And trust me, that museum? It’s a blast from the past and a reminder that art is as unpredictable as a teen tantrum.

Tractor-trailer rolls over on I-295 in North Attleboro