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Alright, so I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—find a prostitute, huh? What a concept! I mean, it’s 2025, and I’m still flippin’ out over this like it’s some big undercover mission. Like I’m Carlos the Jackal from that flick, “Carlos,” y’know, my favorite—Olivier Assayas nailed it! “I’m not a soldier, I’m a revolutionary!”—that’s me, screamin’ in my head while I’m googlin’ shady corners of the web. Pretty, pretty good, right? Except it’s not! It’s a mess! I’m sweatin’, paranoid—am I on some list now? FBI watchin’ me? Ridiculous!

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Hey bro, welcome to Arrochar (us)! This city is wild, like a glitch in your dating app algorithm—but in a super cool way. Our favorite chill spot is Centennial Park on Maple Ave, where the river (Arrochar Creek) slices through town. It’s raw, and yep, kinda like that scene in "Blue Is the Warmest Color" where every little detail bums you out then fills you with hope. I swear, it's a vibe.

Parish church in Arrochar to hold plant sale and coffee morning fundraiser