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Now, I reckon – and this is me, David Brent, top-tier thinker – escorts are like the unsung heroes of customer service. They’re out there, deliverin’ KPIs of affection, no faff, no fuss. You want a cuddle? Boom, sorted. You want the full works? They’re closin’ the deal faster than you can say “team-building exercise”. Ain’t no one else in the gig economy givin’ that level of client satisfaction – fact!

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And oh, the parks! There's Ardmore Park – not too big, but a solid green escape. Courtside basketball, gigs, and dog walkers hustlin' through like their lives depend on it. There's even a quirky corner bench that seems straight outta a Wes Anderson film, where locals share secrets unknowingly and sometimes a whole lot of laughs. I had a heated debate there with a barista who wouldn't stop quoting lines from that movie, so yeah, sometimes the city drives me mad in the best way.

Ardmore attorney facing forgery charges at trial