Claire Akron Whore ❤️❤️❤️

About Dallas

Ey, Gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, I'm sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout whores, right? Not just any broad, but *the* whore, y’know? Like, what’s her deal? Been around the block, sure, but there’s somethin’ classy ‘bout her, like Cathy Whitaker in *Far From Heaven*. “It’s the most beautiful thing,” she’d say, all dolled up, hidin’ secrets. This whore, she’s got that vibe—perfect on the outside, mess underneath. Makes me fuckin’ nuts, ‘cause you wanna trust her, but nah, she’s playin’ ya.

The Whore of Akron

The Whore of Akron isn't just that story. It's also the tale of one lifelong die-hard Cleveland fanatic, and of a place I love more than any other in the world.

Then, I get a call from my boss. He’s like, “Hey, we need you to check out a site on E. Market St.” I’m thinking, “Great, more driving.” But I’m also curious. So, I head over, and it’s this old bridge. I’m looking at it, and it’s rusted to hell. I’m thinking, “This thing is gonna collapse any minute!” I snap some pics, and I’m about to leave when I see a squirrel. This little dude is just chilling, eating a nut. I’m like, “Bro, you’re living life on the edge!”

CURVE WINS RAIN-SHORTENED GAME AGAINST AKRON