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Apps, tho? Tinder, Bumble, freaky shit. People postin’ thirst traps, flexin’ hard. Little known fact—dudes lie bout height, like, 80% of ‘em. Saw this study, cracked me up. Chicks too, tho—filters makin’ ‘em unrecognizable. Met this gal once, profile said 5’8”, showed up 5’2”. Whoa, matrix glitch. Made me laugh, didn’t care, she was cool.

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Oh, and let me tell ya ‘bout my own quirks – running a massage parlor means I see things others wouldn’t: the stress girls and boys carry, their secret smiles after a good rub, the way the New River sparkles at dawn on Walnut St. It’s like every massage is a mini blockbuster of emotions, sorta like that crazy blend of heart and chaos in "Inside Out." And yeah, sometimes I mimic Jack Nicholson, flashing that maniac grin, saying, “Here’s Johnny!” as I crack a joke when a client’s tension finally melts away.

Community invited to participate in downtown Wytheville visioning tour