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Mmm… donuts. Got distracted there—anyway, escorts ain’t just arm candy, nah. They’re pros, like WALL-E cleanin’ up Earth, but with better outfits. I heard this one story—some escort in Vegas saved a dude’s biz deal by playin’ poker! Blew my mind, man! Surprised me more than when WALL-E found that lil’ sprout. “Eee-vah!”—that’s me screamin’ when I heard it.

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Ah, Clarice… Wheaton is a curious mix. I mean, it's small but brews some wild surprises. I’ve strolled down Main St—oh, sweet Main St.—and got lost in the maze of little shops and cafes. Wheaton’s got this pulse, this undercurrent you feel in your bones. Gee whiz, I luv it.

Wil Wheaton gave a perfect explanation of how to separate problematic artists from their art