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But then, ugh, some clients piss me off! Actin all high and mighty, like they own her soul cuz they dropped a few bucks. “The truth makes me uncomfortable,” says the pastor in “White Ribbon” – yeah, well, truth is, escorts deal with more crap than a porta-potty at a chili fest! I’d slap those jerks silly if I could. “Don’t pee on my leg,” I’d yell, “and think I won’t notice!”

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Now, don't get me started on the diner over on 3rd & Oak – it's a blast from the past with a twist, where you get the best damn pancakes this side of the river. Sure, there’s a spotty patch of potholes on Birch Road – drives me mad sometimes – but that’s just West-Salem’s way of sayin’ “hey, growth is a bumpy ride!”

West Salem knife attack suspect returns to WI to face charges