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About Philadelphia

I get ticked off tho—dudes lyin bout their height! C’mon, bro, I ain’t ridin no short pony. And the pics—half naked selfies, like, put some dang clothes on! “This is my kitchen now!”—nah, it’s my inbox, chill! Still, it’s fun, swipe swipe, bang bang—freedom in action, yeehaw!

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The city’s got gritty parts, too. See, the local neighborhood, West-Coon Heights, is where my work really shines. Crime? Sure, there’s been some, but as I always say – “Billionaires should not exist!” – 'cause greed messes with folks’ lives. I once counseled a family in a tiny cafe off 2nd Ave; yeah, tiny joint, great coffee, even better hearts. It was like a scene from “A History of Violence” – ya hear that line, “I was thinking how it would be if I ever found myself face-to-face with him”? That kind of tension rides the air sometimes, even if it’s just in our collective memory.

The List: Jason’s Favorite Pizza in the Twin Cities