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So anyway, I’m diggin’ deeper—web’s full of crap, X is worse. Found this one post, guy’s braggin’ ‘bout his “date,” links to some sketchy site. Clicked it—boom, virus! My laptop’s screamin’ like Kenny when he dies! Pissed me off so bad I yelled, “You can’t trick Eric Cartman, you bastards!” Took me an hour to fix that shit. Lesson? Don’t trust everythin’ you see—half these “girls” are bots or dudes named Steve. True story, my cousin saw one once—biggest surprise of his life, hairy legs and all!

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I learned that one time, layin' on the massage table in my dingy, cluttered workspace near Mission Ave, I drifted off thinkin’ bout how each neighborhood got its own heartbeat. Downtown Waukee’s spinnin’ with art shows, quirky diner joints on Market St, and local legends like old man Harris’s corner store, surprise surprises, every day was an adventure. Can't always remember details ‘cause I'm a bit scatterbrained, but hey, that's the charm, right?

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