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About Phoenix

Oi, mate, escort? What a laugh! Some posh twat drivin’ a fancy car? Nah, escort’s that Ford banger, innit? The Ford Escort, bloody hell, what a relic! Used to see ‘em everywhere, cloggin’ up streets, smoky exhausts chokin’ ya lungs. Like in *The Pianist*—“I’m not going anywhere!”—yeah, ‘cos it’s knackered, ain’t it? Piece o’ shit conks out every five minutes!

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Now check it – if you're up for a park chill, head over to Liberty Park. It's this sweet little green lung where you can bench and bask under the sun. I sometimes get a lil' peace there, massagin' my own tired soul after a long day. Oh, and if you're into hidden gems, try out that hole-in-the-wall diner on Oak St – meal's good, but the fries? Outta this world, I swear.

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