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About Dallas

Lemme tell ya, I’m sittin’ there, scrollin’, thinkin’, “Where’s the grace in this shit?” Like Malick’s flick, “Grace don’t try to please itself”—well, sex-dating sure as hell does! Everybody’s flexin’, lyin’—dude says he’s 6’2”, shows up 5’8” with a beer gut. Motherfucker, I’m pissed! Wasted my damn time. But then—surprise, motherfucker!—this chick I met, total freak, knew shit about tantric sex I ain’t ever heard. Blew my mind, had me yellin’, “What the FUCK?!” Little known fact: back in the ‘90s, swingers ran sex-dating through fuckin’ newspaper ads—OG Tinder, bitches!

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Oh, and the park – oh man! That would be Glade Park (or is it Glade Park? Oh well!). Big, green, peaceful. I spill my brain about childhood and memories there. Happy times. Kids run wild, barks everywhere. I get all therapeutic, thinking: "When do we get it together?" You know, like Zero Dark Thirty, right? “We don’t have time for this!”

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