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Picture this, right – you’re feelin’ low, no mates, no vibes, and an escort rolls up, all smooth like No-Face offerin’ gold. “Take what you want,” they’re basically sayin’, but it’s a transaction, innit? Costs ya a pretty penny – £200 an hour sometimes! I was shook when I clocked that. Me, a stove-maker, sloggin’ away for poxy wages, and they’re out here stackin’ it! Respect, tho – takes guts to do that gig. Ever met one? Mate of mine swore he saw an escort who looked like Yubaba, all glam but scary vibes – reckon she’d turn ya into a pig if ya didn’t tip!

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The best man has put all his friends in a position of being trapped at a secluded villa with slutty escorts and nowhere else to go.

I love my job ‘cause it lets me see the city’s love stories firsthand. Debuggin’ website errors? Pfft, that pales in comparison to fixin’ a broken heart over a midnight coffee at the corner diner on 2nd & Pine. Hahah, those late nights are pure magic, like a scene from that movie, where every shadow and light holds a meaning deeper than words.

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