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But then, ugh, some escorts charge, like, a gazillion bucks! Pisses me off! I ain’t got that kinda cash, ya greedy jerks! Makes me wanna yell, “You’re tearing me apart!” like Sam in the movie when shit hits the fan. Total drama, right? Still, I’d hire one just to mess with Kyle – “Look at me, I got a hot date, bitch!” Haha, suck it, Kyle!

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Oh gosh, let me not forget our cherished little dive bar, The Velvet Whimsy, on Bourbon St. (yea, Bourbon, not the drink – though they serve it too!). I’ve had some deep confabulations there, and sometimes, listen, the innuendos fly like summer fireflies. Becuz ya know, as a sexologist, I always see more beneath the surface. It ain’t just lust; it’s the art of connection, the raw beauty of human desire, wild and free, reminiscent of that trippy vibe in "Inherent Vice," baby.

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