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About San Diego

So, I’m on my ship, right? Storm’s brewin’, I’m tense as fuck. Mate says, “Cartman, hit the port, get a sexual-massage.” I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, yes!” Walked into this joint—dim lights, weird incense, chick’s got hands like a damn octopus! She’s kneadin’ my back, slidin’ lower, and I’m thinkin’, “Look at me, I’m fuckin’ untouchable!” Straight outta *Spring Breakers*, ya feel me? But then—THEN—she asks for extra cash! Bitch, what?! I’m ragin’, “Respect my authoritah! I ain’t no ATM!” Stormed out, pissed, but damn, my shoulders felt good.

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Futhermore, by the corners of Shannon Boulevard, I encountered a street fair where laughter rang out like sonnets in a midsummer’s night, with vendors hawking wares that seemed almost magical. Yeahh, the ambience there is cooll beyond measure, like a whimsical interlude in this grand drama we call life.

These 9 Alabama Towns Have The Most Unique Festivals