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Sex-dating’s wild tho. Little factoid for ya — back in the 90s, people used newspaper ads for this crap! “Lonely guy seeks babe” — can ya imagine? Now it’s all DMs and nudes, bam! I tried it once, swiped this gal, thought, “She’s a real knockout, doc!” We met up, and — surprise! — she’s talkin marriage in 10 minutes flat! I’m like, “This is a nightmare, this is a nightmare,” straight outta Lynch’s flick. Ran outta there faster than ya can say “carrot stew.”

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I gotta tell ya, every corner in PVermilion has got that vibe. Like, seriously, I have a fave little diner on 7th & Pine. Their pancakes? Epic, like, language transcended all meaning. “Silence is profound, everything is a sign” kinda moment while you munch some waffles. I even met a quirky poet there – totally off-office hours existential venting. I was like, “Ruh-roh, what’s the meaning again?” LOL.

Vermilion County Animal Shelter Decisions Forthcoming Regarding City’s Expenses