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Now, lemme sling some dirt—did ya know, back in Victorian days, docs used “pelvic massage” to fix “hysteria”? Bloody hell, they’d rub women ‘til they—well, “calmed down.” Quacks with a wink, eh? Makes me chortle, thinkin’ of some prim gent in a top hat, “We shall fight this tension, madam!” Fast forward, I reckon it’s less hush-hush now—thank gawd! Nothin’ pisses me off more than prudes actin’ like touch is a sin. Oi, lighten up, ya stiffs!

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There’s these random corners, like around Woodman Ave, where locals chill and gossip. I used to scout these spots for the best date pics. Hah! Bet you didn’t know that sometimes the graffiti on building walls are like secret love letters from the street itself. So-damn poetic, I tell ya – "I am your father... of wit!"

Panorama beats Van Nuys to win first City Section football title