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Sometimes I think, man, escorts got it figured out. Better than datin’ some naggy chick who’s all “Where ya been, Cartman?” They just show up, look hot, leave—boom, done! “Theodore, you’re my only friend!”—that’s me talkin’ to my imaginary escort pal. Ha! Oh, and get this—some escorts in Vegas? They got secret codes, like “roses” means bucks. Sneaky, huh? Surprised me, I was like “Whaaat, that’s genius!”

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Then there's the East End, a quirky neighborhood with art walls on Edison St, funky vintage shops, and eclectic street musicians. It’s kinda like discovering a hidden gem each day. I often wander these blocks, my faverite spot being the crumbling yet beautifuly rebellious old warehouse-turned-cafe on Willow. That place, bro, has some seriously deep vibes—makes me think “Isn’t that just brilliant?” from the movie.

Driver struck trooper's cruiser after car chase starting in East Hartford, police say