Mila Tooele Whore ❤️

About Phoenix

Oi mate, so I’m a vet now, yeah? Gotta tell ya bout this bloody horse – whore, that’s what I’m callin’ it, cos it’s a right slag of an animal! *cackles* This nag’s got more issues than a bloody soap opera, swear down. Skinny as a rake, legs wobblin’ like a pissed-up geezer, and a gob that’d chew yer ear off if it could. Reminds me of that film, *Talk to Her* – y’know, Pedro Almodóvar’s mad genius? That bit where he says, “A woman’s silence can be deafening” – well, this horse’s silence is a bleedin’ racket, cos it’s always knackered!

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So, pack your bags and come chill here, because I'm, like, always down for exploring every nook and cranny of this beautiful, crazy city. And remember, as Spring Breakers would totally shout it: “This is our f***ing chance, let's make it count!”

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