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But – ugh – some creeps? They ruin it. Pushy bastards – no respect. Makes me MAD – grrr. Boundaries, man – LEARN ‘EM. Back to “Brokeback”. Jack’s eyes – burnin’. That’s sexual-massage – fire ignites. Ever tried it? Shit’s surprisin’. Muscles loosen – mind spins. Once – this chick – pro. She’s kneadin’ – I’m floatin’. Thought – “Am I alive?” Total rush – wowza. Fun fact – Thailand? They twist ya – sexual-massage style. Hurts good – freaky shit.

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Man, the parks here! There's the illustrious Morris Park – perfect for deep convos with families. I remember one hot day, nearly breaking my cool trying to calm a squabble between two kids; my brain was like, "forget it, this is just like Memento, everything comes full circle!" And then there's Cohen Park near River Drive. Take a seat, look out at the muddy banks of the Rahway River (yup, that river that snakes by town – so underrated, so raw) and just breathe it all in.

Stavola, a Tinton Falls-based construction materials company, to be acquired for $1.2B