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So, I tink ‘bout dis one time, right? Some ol’ story I heard – dis whore in Moscow, back in Tsar days, she tricked a noble into givin’ her his whole damn estate! Swindled him wit’ a wink and a vodka shot. Lightbulb! Dat’s da kinda smarts ya don’t see in books, eh? Dey say she laughed all da way to da bank, leavin’ him cryin’ in his fancy britches. Makes me chuckle, dat sly fox! Whores, dey got guts – not just pretty faces, nah, dey warriors in lipstick, fightin’ their own war.

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And then there’s Overpeck Park, oh man. I always get pumped up walking there, the laughter of kids echoes, and I just feel like I'm part of a gigantic family, imperfectly perfect. Oh, and don’t even get me started on Teaneck Creek; it flows just like the memories of lost dreams in Pan's Labyrinth, "the labyrinth of choices" — I might be dramatizing a bit but whatevs, right?

NY man, 26, charged with murder in shooting of twin sister inside Teaneck home